life according to me

life according to me

So Not Feelin’ the Photosh*t Love

TrichotillomaniaOh my gawd — all I want to do is write.

I don’t want to read Photoshop tutorials.

I just want to poke the buttons to create something. You know — like my banner. The one I really want. Not the palm tree. But maybe me hanging from the palm frond and screaming, “I HATE PHOTOSHOP!”

I don’t want to have to ask what the hell the “editor” is and then get completely pissed off when there isn’t a simple answer for what is probably the tool bar. And if it is the tool bar, why can’t they just call it that? You know, like why can’t all microwaves and remote controls be made exactly alike? What is up with always calling things different names? Jeez. Especially when it is a freaking functional thing.

I just don’t want to deal with why I can’t open a photo, open a new workspace (or whatever the hell they call that!) then click and drag the photo into the workspace. I mean, how completely easy would that be? CRAP!

I don’t want to watch the stoopid videos telling me how to do something and then when it’s time to do it, not be able to figure it out. Let’s see…how do I watch the video, which opens and runs on Firefox (okay by me) and have Photoshop open (which sort of goes away unless you’re “clicked” on it) and do what the tutorial says? Ph*ck! It just MAKES ME WANT TO PULL ALL MY HAIR OUT. Yah. I can do that and spin upside down while whistling Dixie out of where the sun doesn’t shine. Sign me up for the freak show before I completely explode.

Every single direction has another set of directions so you can understand a term that’s in another set of directions. Can I please have visuals for gawd’s sake. That wouldn’t be TOO DIFFICULT would it?

I want Al Gore’s computer set up The Guru of 3D -- Al Gore's Kind of a Computer Freak discussed here so I can open 14 freaking windows and look back and forth at them. Then maybe, just maybe I won’t have to jump up and do laundry, or get the hell out of this room before I start throwing things. REALLY.

Cut and paste. Okay? It could be that simple. sh*t-s*it-*hit-shi*#@#!^%&*$$#^*(^$#%^^&*&**(*^%$$^&&*!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I don’t like NOT being productive. EVER. I’m not good at it. Doing NOTHING or having NOTHING to show for my time just doesn’t cut it. And I’m NOT going for a walk to blow off this steam BECAUSE I ALREADY DID AT 5:30 THIS MORNING.

Maybe if I lay down on the floor and kick and scream I’ll feel better. The capital letters and symbols aren’t cutting it. AT ALL.

Watching this guy made me feel a bit better, however, because I LOVE my Mac. But he’s having the same sort of melt down that I am, so we must be soul mates or something. He does come around, though, so I’m sure that I will too, because I’m tenaciously, persistently, annoyingly, unceasingly, freaking NOT GIVING UP.

But I’m so NOT loving PHOTOSHOP. NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT.



8 thoughts on “So Not Feelin’ the Photosh*t Love”

  • OMG I so feel you’re pain! Nothing will give me a migraine like photoshop. Way too itimadating for me to do anything but the basics. You’ll come through 🙂

  • Hey Deb. Yah, I gave up for the day. I’m working on the other stuff, but now am noticing how slow everything is. Crap. Gormet mac-a-cheese tonight for dinner. Maybe I’ll go smother my sorrows in cheese and black truffle oil since tomorrow is weigh in day. Snort.

  • Sorry you’re having trouble, you are way past me though, I still can’t figure out the TV FIOS remote. That guy was FUNNY!!! I loved it!

  • Kelly, Hang in there. I really like your new design. Very nice and clean. If you like taking photos, you could post a new one every so often rather than trying to get one “just right” which may make life a little easier on you. (Just a thought). BTW, if you get stuck on something, drop me a note. Be glad to help if I can.

  • Hi Phil, Thanks, always for your suggestions and especially your offers of help.

    I actually was thinking about doing the monthly or seasonal change, but am looking for a common element to incorporate. Maybe I’m vain, but do believe it’s a recognition kind of thing — like this is “my” blog. It takes a while to settle into a new wrap for me. Doesn’t feel quite right at first. Have been reading a lot of the WP codex and going back through things. Takes me a while (because I get distracted), but I’m learning.

  • Kelly, I agree with your 100% about Photoshop and that’s why I’m still using Paint Shop Pro by Corel. It’s pretty much Photoshop and Illustrator in one less than $100 package.

    Unfortunately, my Photoshop studying must continue. Employers seem to require their web developers (like me) to actually know Photoshop. Sheesh! 🙂

  • Hey Anthony! Fancy meeting you here! Don’t you just hate it when people expect you to do things their way? What the hell is up with that? Er… um…yes, I’m still plugging away with the software, too. Maybe I’ll have really young brain cells when I’m old. All this damn learning…

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