life according to me

life according to me

Where in Hell did the day go this time?

Do you know what’s worse than being a dedicated blogger, don’t you? Being a dedicated cook. A cook with a cooking blog. And what could possibly top that? Having said blogs and having your husband at home for a week. It isn’t that he’s here that causes the problem — it’s the hopping and moving and shaking. You know. Going places and doing things. So blogging in general causes the first round of why the hell my house looks the way it does, and the MoH being on vacation mode (a much deserved one btw) really sends the ol’ hacienda over the edge. Over the edge and into the dump. The good thing about all of this? We’ve done every thing there is to do, so now the RT and I can grow roots for the rest of the summer. Trick.

So what did I do today with resolve to shower first thing, read the paper to stay abreast of cutting edge news find something blogworthy, exercise, and get some much needed house projects done — which really means make a bigger mess than already exists. What did I do? I’ve been checking out other’s blogs. For TWO HOURS. There is simply not enough time in the day to do what I want to do. I find that to be a problem. I could use an additional six hours to take care of my responsibilities. The list grows as I write:

  1. Revamp my Phoodplan. Let’s face it, I was doomed to failure from the start. But there’s more to it. Does it make sense that for eight weeks I was excellent. On the job — well, okay, four. Four serious weeks, with four more of a dwindling, oozing kind of problem. But still. My VBF did come around again, we did start walking at the crack of freaking dawn again, and after getting within spitting distance (if you’re a weak spitter) of the magical 10 lubs lost mark, I popped up four lubs. So being the human I am, I flipped the flying bird to the Thinner bitch in my bathroom IMG_0963and stopped measuring and writing, and doing everything related to the Phoodplan except walk — a few miles a day at least five days a week. And guess what? I stayed the same. How can that be? So today (after diligently eating branflakes with 1% and blueberries……and later two pieces of raisin cinnamon toast……with butter &@#$***&$@%%%%%…..)I’m going to revise what I said I’d do. And hell no, I’ll not lose 50 lubs by September. But that shouldn’t be the goal. More later. sounds noble, doesn’t it?
  2. Clean my refrigerator. You should see it. Really. We’re at the “shoving it in and slamming the door before everything else falls out” code mold stage of non-Martha-ness with our refrigerator. My middle son dropped by the other day, opened the fridge to get some milk and after lining up a few cartons on the counter asked, “So what kind of a problem are you guys having with milk?” with a smirk on his face. I let him know that it’s not a problem, but simple: whole milk for the ice cream recipe, 1% for my cereal, half ‘n’ half for the MoH’s tea, whipping cream for the creme brulee recipe, 2% for the RT and his addiction to chocolate milk, buttermilk for the sorbet recipe, and heavy cream for the chocolate cake recipe. Okay, so maybe it’s a problem.
  3. Cook and post recipes from less fat laden sources. Not nearly as fun, and often not as tasty — but not always. My body and my refrigerator would be forever thankful. But the dairy council of American will most likely send a hit squad out to get me. Or I’ll have mad cows on my doorstep mooing in protest. On second thought, that may be more conducive to sleep than the army of lawnmowers and hedge cutters outside first thing this morning.
  4. Get a job. Ugh. I don’t want a job. GardenerI’d like to earn some money occasionally, though. Dog WalkerOr even routinely. That might be nice. I do remember it was swell to have a dollar in my wallet once in a while. Bear in mind I didn’t say I didn’t want to work. CookThere’s a big difference between having a job and working. Tutoring I should clarify by saying that I’d like to earn money in a less than typical eight-to-five way. Writers-publish dot comI’m not going to mention too loudly the earn money from home thing, because I could write for an entire week about that racket and its related gimmicks, purple kool-aid drinkers, and downright scum-sucking scammers. I’ll save that story for another day, also. I’ll call it, “How Not to Be the Poster Child for the Work At Home Scam Sucker Born Last Minute.”
  5. Try to get straight all the summer reality TV shows we’re watching. Really. I need a tote board or something. The person who used to scoff at others for wasting their time with such drivel. Me. Sanctimonious moi. “The Next Food Network Star,” “Top Chef,” “Hell’s Kitchen,” and “So You Think You Can Dance” all compete for our time. Thank goodness for our DVR. Otherwise, we’d have to watch….uh…..I dunno? Maybe we could each vanish into separate rooms in the house doing our own thing instead of being together in the family room familying like the good family we are. I haven’t written about any of these shows like I have in the past with American Noodle, but that isn’t because I haven’t wanted to. So much to say, so little time….But I will take the time to say this: I found someone who Giada drives as crazy as me. You know. That woman with the teeth and the cleevage who acts like she can cook. Giada De-Lah-Cookless Check out Jerry’s well executed tirade at Cooking By the Seat of My Pants. I think he’s my hero.
  6. Keep making progress on my pile o’ books. I’m experimenting with sidebar widgets because I less than love writing book reviews. Especially when I haven’t loved the book. It’s like kicking a dead horse. Well, maybe not all the time. But I’ve got to have some credibility, right? Let you know where I am with that pile. What’s shining, and what’s to be avoided — just in case you’re inclined to dash to the bookstore to ready a Pulitzer winner that’s five years old instead of the newest. Right? I just finished this The Reader at Random House and this, and am getting ready to read this The History of Love at Authors on the Web. I just bought it. I know. I said I wouldn’t spend money for books. But I couldn’t resist. It’s a problem. Read, Spot, read. See Spot go.
  7. Catch up and keep up with my food blog posts. They take freaking forever to write. And Typepad loads the photos soooooooo slowly. I have gazillions of photos of food I’ve made and only a fraction of them posted. It’s grueling. Salads, desserts, main dishes, breakfast food. *sigh* I believe I did find in my food blog surfing yesterday, a cool new flickr toy that will make it all so much easier — and eye appealing. I’ll get back to you on that one.
  8. Say thanks to a few people on the internet who have recognized me….
  • Mel at Freak Parade who I miss quite a bit, who has decided that I’m a Rockin’ Blogger. Woot! Rockin’ Blogger I wondered what that rumbling was all about. Does it help burn calories? Mel is an outstanding human whom I enjoy tremendously. Her blog makes me laugh, stirs me to frustrated anger, and makes me cry.
  • Ev, the ever busy and ubiquitous personality behind My Life is Murphy’s Law, has deemed me worthy of an Imaginif award. It was started by Megan at Imaginif, a site dedicated to keeping children safe in all ways. I know my 15 year-old is safe. He’s a house potato like me. Yep, I know what he looks at on line, too. That’s my job! Imaginif Award
  • Steve at Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Blogosphere, 100 Bloggers, and Joyful Jubilant Learning — quite the involved and industrious group of individuals — wrote a great post recognizing my writing which always makes me puffier than I already am from all that food loving I engage in. He found me on the Technorati Billy Collins trail which I have to check out, being the Billy fan that I am. What an interesting way to be found on the Internet. Kind of like a needle in a haystack. But he found me!

Thanks for the kudos! And apologies that it’s belated. It’s heartfelt just the same. I will begin my thinking on when and how to pass the recognition along….



9 thoughts on “Where in Hell did the day go this time?”

  • Awww! I shouldn’t be yer hero… OK, I can be, but I’ll only do it under protest, Howwzat?

    There’s another FN star under the gun this coming Thursday, so stay tuned, though this time I might have something nice to say 😀

  • You are freaking hilarious! You really are darlin. I’m so glad you just found it so now I don’t feel so bad about not findin that meme tag
    thingy for a what? a few weeks?

    Oh, Lord, what us oldsters gonna do? Cept laff more!!! LOL!!

    My brother told me his wife hates her birthdays? Are you freakin serious??? They are inevitable..better luv em!

  • Can’t wait, Jerry. I’ve got a few things to say myself. I just don’t know where to start. Like which show drives me the most nuts. Which host? And this year, can anyone really, actually cook?

    Hey, Ev. Thanks for the forgiveness. I enjoyed your birthday pix. I have a “movie” of mine. The funniest part is the dog rolling in something unmentionable in fast motion on the grass….

  • good lord, i got tired just reading all the things you do, want to do, and try ever so hard to avoid doing!!!!!!
    i work,, and don’t let em fool ya… its not all its cracked up to be… takes way to much time away from reading blogs and avoiding housework!!!!!!!

  • Kelly, The cry’n shame in my life is that I lose time to sit and soak in the rythms and rhymes of your pros. You make me smile with your every entry. Whatever work you find yourself getting into, I wish it to be profitable, enjoyable and a real source of inspiration for the rest of us poor working souls tied to our places of indenture, hmmm I mean employment.

  • Oh darling Kellypea, there is simply not enough time in your day for anything more!! I am exhausted and side split after reading your monumental daily exercise!!

    Congratulations on your awards you clever girl!! I love your blog.

    Have you read The Little Chinese Seamstress yet?
    I really enjoyed it xx

  • Hello, Minx. I hope you’re recovering well…Yes, Chinese Seamstress & The Reader have some interesting connections that I’ll write about today. And thanks for laughing.

    Phil, as always, I could write an entire post on the business of what I’ll do with the rest of my working life. I guess the reason I haven’t “found” something yet is because I’m still thawing out. I should be done by September. But I have to be serious at this point. Otherwise the MoH could string me up!

    Hey Paisley, I completely agree. I don’t know that I’ve been bored a day in my life — well except when I’ve had to stand at a copy machine. For some reason, it makes me want to rip my hair out…

  • I know you have 100s of books still left to read, but I just finished two that were great. Didn’t think they were “my type” but I couldn’t put them down : “Sister of My Heart” and “Snowflower & the Secret Fan”….in case you needed new titles to add to your list 🙂

    Congrats on your Bloggin’ Awards! I keep sending people your way!

  • I’ve heard about Snowflower and understand it’s really good. Just started the History of Love. Strange. I guess when you’ve already been published you get to write however you want. I think that’s why I chose it. I love it when they break all the rules.

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