For some reason I’ve had the concept of “quitting” on my mind. It’s most likely because it’s September and there was one very large goal I had set for myself to accomplish by now. Remember that song called Dust in the Wind by Kansas? That would be my theme song with the exception that my goal is now dust in the wind.
So I’ve begun a tally of sorts, as calorie-less food for thought on just how much I’ve said kapoots to in my life. I’m more inclined to consider that it’s all about revision instead of quitting. That’s a more constructive way to think dupe myself about it. Regardless, once I’ve said I’m going to do something, and then decide not to do it, that’s quitting, isn’t it? At what point might I begin to consider that it’s a problem? And to whom? Does it matter? And if it does, what might the underlying reasons be? I know there are people out there who never quit anything because they believe it exhibits weakness. Who’s to say they’re correct and that people like me are in the wrong? Sticking with something you’d rather not is more of a problem than throwing in the towel, but it’s only my opinion.
The Business of Quitting:
- The Phoodplan: This was doomed from the start. My buddy bailed almost immediately, and I set too lofty a goal. I must not think I’m all that fat, or I’d do something about it. I’ve been lulled into thinking that all those women painted in impressionistic art are not thin, so there must be some degree of beauty in adipose tissue, right? Actually, health would be the central issue here. Weight loss was to have been a perk on the side. It hasn’t left my mind. So did I quit?
- My commitment to not purchase new books: You’ve forgotten and/or it doesn’t matter to you, correct? Just the same, I’m confessing that I have read some books on my list, left others I have around the house off the list, and have purchased new books I’ve not quite added to that list. Is quitting and not keeping a commitment the same?
- My job: More than once. It’s not funny, but it’s truly a relief I think about every single day first thing in the morning. Other people may think that this is not a big deal. In my profession, it rarely happens. It’s all about making it to the magic retirement date. I didn’t make that date which will cost me quite a bit o’ moolah (50%) when I begin to draw my retirement in 10 years. I savor the idea of all the great things I can learn and do in those 10 years that I wouldn’t have been able to do had I kept that job.
- A boy I was engaged to: I knew him six years and I can’t imagine not having the life I now have which wouldn’t exist if I’d married him. My children. My husband. Our shared experiences. No thanks.
- A different marriage: No comment.
- Drinking white zinfandel: Thankfully. What was I thinking outside of “where’s my straw?”
- Once upon a time good friends: They’ve sort of disappeared into their own lives and I into mine. When I’ve tried to get back in touch, it hasn’t worked. I always feel like this is my fault. I deserve to be talked about at their parties.
- Piano Lessons and all those songs I learned to play half way through: At some point, I was done. I hadn’t set out to be famous, so…what does that mean? It brings new meaning to “plays a little.”
- Rowing: I liked the idea of this sport, but it was too time consuming and difficult. Yes, I quit after about two months. With my tongue hanging out and a lot of respect for those who do it.
- A Business: It never got off the ground because the timing wasn’t right, it was scary, and others were uncomfortable about the effect it would have on them. What a bunch of excuses.
- Drinking Light Beer: How do you spell swill?
- Using Margarine: How can people eat “partially hydrogenated” anything and not know it’s seriously bad for their bodies?
- Drinking Diet Soda: “Formaldehyde is formed in the body from the methanol released during aspartame digestion. It is a poison that has been proved to cause gradual neurological damage, immunological damage, and irreversible genetic damage at extremely low-dose, long-term exposure. Internal damage and changes occur long before poisoning symptoms become clinically evident.” If that’s not disgusting, I don’t know what is. Go ahead. Do a Google search yourself.
- Network Television: Is there really anything on? I dislike the commercials, the phony audience laughter they insist in retaining, the commitment it takes to watch whether it’s DVR’d or not. It just isn’t any good.
- Countless projects I was enthused about when I began them: This is the bane of my existence. I don’t understand it. Truly. Projects I’d love to dig back into. They’re like sad little reminders of change.
As far as going out of my way to quit something I truly enjoy as Edgar Albert Guest advocates in his poem “On Quitting,” that hasn’t happened yet.
And it’s not on my calendar.
What about you?
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