Oh Look. Writing.

Somehow, all the time I used to look forward to — all the time I spent thinking about what I might write here is gone.  The unfortunate aspect of this is that the writing voice I hear during the day has faded, its insistent prodding, its litany of opening lines, and reminders of possible topics have been pushed aside by life.  And what a small life it is.

Sounds dramatic, doesn’t it?

It should be, but I don’t have the time right now to make it that way.  Too much dust and food, and excuses.  It isn’t that I don’t want to write here.  Honestly.  It’s more about the type of writer I am.

I have to use a food analogy.  Sorry.

If you turn the burner on low and let the water simmer, then turn up the heat as the water approaches the boil, then that would be me.  There’s no turning me on high and cutting to the chase.  I could do that if I wanted, but what’s the point?

Writing is a catharsis for me and if I can’t spend the time, then the words stay in my mind.  And I’m egotistical enough to know that once I’ve formed the perfect line of words to convey the just right thought, they’ll be forgotten unless I write them down.  It’s sad.

I do get credit for:

1) working on a cookbook for a friend which entailed making most of the recipes and snapping photos, right?

2) spending more time than I wanted –surprisingly — looking at products for our home renovation.

3)  getting ready to visit several blogging friends for a week!

4)  having to reposition myself in my home while contractors tear it to shreds and dust settles on every possible surface.

Excuses.

Sad, because so much has happened that I have thoughts about — some lovely, and others, not so much.  And all of which would have been written at one point in time.  But no.  And it’s horrible.

The other problem is, even if I write here, everyone has either left the building, or has stopped writing, their bloggy wonderfulness seemingly forever ended, their words and photos, just sitting, no longer collecting comments.  *sigh*

What to do?

Sign up for that writing class at UCSD extension so I’ll actually write?  Continue to wallow through this strange new life of mine?

What?

7 Replies to “Oh Look. Writing.”

  1. i too am at a loss for words.. i have the time,, just not the words.. it has begun to seem as if everything i could have to say,, has been said,, and i am waiting to see what else my little pea brain can concoct to talk about..

    well,, on the bright side,, i have spent more time out of this chair in the last week than i have in the last year,,,, so i guess everything serves a purpose…..

  2. I am sad that this bright, funny and honest post has moved over for something that is filling your life now. It is all in your head and heart and will find a way out. The class is a good idea. When your home is settled you can focus on writing again. In the meantime, you are making many mouths water just looking at your wonderful photos.

  3. you get mad credit for ALL OF THAT! I am especially impressed with “working on a cookbook”

    YAY.

    Yanno, I have blog posts in my head all day and when I sit down to put them on paper? They vanish.

  4. I say you should get credit just for being. Because that’s hard enough sometimes, right? (If you’re like, what the hell is she talking abt right now? don’t tell me, I don’t want to know I’m the only one.)

    Put all that other stuff on top of it and truly: I think you’re doing *more than fine.*

  5. The food excuses are good ones. If it’s meant to be written it will be written. Life is to be lived.

    I understand the catharsis part, it’s helpful. I call my blog the cigarette for the non smoker.

    When you truly need to write you will. Until that time your plate is quite full.

  6. Kelly, I love reading your writing and catching up here… Do what you need to do. Take those classes, write your cookbook. Come back here when you can and your faithful readers will be waiting. 🙂

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